New bereavement support centre will "make a real difference to young people's lives"

Wednesday, 1 June 2022 16:20

By Greg Lambert @greglam72

A new bereavement support centre to help children who have lost a loved one has opened at St John's Hospice in Lancaster.

The Forget Me Not Centre was opened on Wednesday afternoon at a ceremony at the Slyne Road hospice.

The centre will provide a range of therapeutic support for children and families.

The brand new facility has been funded by hospice supporters Nick and Barbara Scholes, who attended the opening.

Other guests included Martin Ainscough, High Sheriff of Lancashire, who performed the official opening, and Councillor Joyce Pritchard, mayor of Lancaster.

LISTEN to Sue McGraw, chief executive officer of St John's Hospice and Maddy Bass, director of nursing at the hospice, talking about the new Forget Me Not Centre.

The centre came about when the Scholes' asked the hospice if they had a big project in mind, that they could help with, to leave a legacy for the future.

Mr Scholes (seen below with Barbara, planting a tree in the Forget Me Not Centre garden) said: "We're really chuffed with this.

"The togetherness between the hospice, the builders and the architects has been fantastic.

"We've been involved in many smaller projects with the hospice. There are some exceptional people who work here."

Mr Scholes thanked Sue McGraw for being "the driving force" behind the project.

"The hospice had to deal with the Covid crisis after building work had commenced, but Sue's enthusiasm and leadership from the word go has been an inspiration to all of us," he said.

"The building has been created for the very sad situations that hopefully will be eased and helped by what goes on inside these four walls.

"We've every confidence that this building will make a real difference to many young people's lives."

Chris Heginbotham, chairman of the board of trustees at the hospice, said the Scholes' had been "quietly supporting the hospice for many years".

"They bought a couple of cars for teams to use. They paid the rent for a year on one of the charity shops in Lancaster. They helped us to develop a quiet place of reflection for patients, families and staff. They even covered the cost of a doctor's salary for a year. We are so grateful.

"The Forget Me Not Centre is Nick and Barbara's legacy and we cannot thank them enough."

She also thanked partners HSBC, Nationwide, Smile 4 Smithy, EDF and Kendal Lions, for the grant funding to help furnish and equip the building, and for an outdoor sensory garden.

Sue McGraw, pictured above with Maddy Bass, said: "The purpose of the Forget Me Not Centre is to look after families.

"If someone who they care about is going to die, and they need that support, we'll be able to do that in space that's not the hospice space, and that's very important.

"Many families don't feel able to go back into the hospice once they have lost someone that they love. And so this dedicated space will mean that we have a more healing environment for them to come back to.

"It's a really proud day. I'm also a little bit humbled at people's generosity."

The Forget Me Not Centre will provide whole family bereavement support, for families in North Lancashire, the South Lakes and parts of North Yorkshire, both at the centre near Lancaster and out in the community; in homes and supporting schools.

A research project carried out by Lancaster University, together with feedback from patients, families and staff, that found individual family members often go to different services, organisations or counsellors for their support. Yet, the research also found that the most effective type of therapy is when the whole family can be together, but there was none available free of charge in the local area.

Therapy sessions will take place in groups, as well as one to one time, to help develop coping skills. Family therapy could include arts and crafts, outdoor activities, creative play and spending real family time together.

The centre will also provide ways for children to create physical ways to remember the ones they love, like putting together Memory Boxes, and support groups will help children to share their experiences and know they’re not alone.

Here are some photos from inside the Forget Me Not Centre.